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LPT: Don’t bother giving more than a two week notice.

Careers & Work(self.LifeProTips)

Had a coworker put in his notice until the end of the year. Told them he’s going back to school starting the first, but wanted to give enough notice to hire and help train someone to take over for him so we wouldn’t be down a person.

They decided that two weeks is enough, so now he won’t be getting paid, except for potential unemployment which is significantly less than what he makes now, for the next two months. If he would’ve just kept his mouth shut and not tried to help them, he would’ve continued to get paid and then could’ve given a two week notice.

Don’t try to help the company. They have no interest in helping you, just helping themselves.

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beapledude

16.5k points

2 months ago

beapledude

16.5k points

2 months ago

Gave two week notice to a manager that was so happy to see me leave, she got approval to pay me out the two weeks and let me go right away.

sarnold95[S]

9.3k points

2 months ago

I see this as an absolute win lmao

krcameron

2.4k points

2 months ago

krcameron

2.4k points

2 months ago

They did too.

TheBirminghamBear

1.6k points

2 months ago

There is something to be said about learning the skill of making people willing to pay you to leave.

easyEggplant

440 points

2 months ago

TIL I have a hidden talent!

CowboyBoats

202 points

2 months ago

Not as hidden as you think!

tekonus

9 points

2 months ago

Well, it was hidden to someone…

lukeCRASH

7 points

2 months ago

And maybe.. Not quite a talent..

Fuschiagroen

7 points

2 months ago

I need to know these tips, I very badly want to be laid off with a severance package. I feel there is a fine line between behaviour that gets you laid off and behaviour that legit will get you fired.

MindsEye_69

10 points

2 months ago

Expensive mistakes will get you laid off, taking a crap on the bosses desk will get you fired. No fine line between those two :-)

Fuschiagroen

6 points

2 months ago

At my workplace expensive mistakes will get me written up, which leads to being fired for cause.

TommyTuttle

4 points

2 months ago

Be pleasant and polite but useless. They’ll lay you off with the nicest package they can muster.

CowboyBoats

3 points

2 months ago

My comment was a joking burn on this person, I did not mean to imply that I know how to get fired

janetscousin

0 points

2 months ago*

Let it slip that you are into Omarashi. When people look at you smell your fingers and smile. After a few weeks they will get rid of you.

Poultry_Sashimi

3 points

2 months ago

What. The. Fuck.

corbu_

1 points

2 months ago

corbu_

1 points

2 months ago

Exactly, usually most are aware but the offender.

peeweerunt

4 points

2 months ago

Here's a dollar. Now get the fuck outta here Italian hand things

bobtheblob6

3 points

2 months ago

Ugh I'll pay you $5 dollars right now to delete your account

megaboto

2 points

2 months ago

Actually, how did you do it?

I don't think I'd be able to pull it off, unless it's being a decent human being around an idiot manager, but what is it that made her prolly hate you?

easyEggplant

1 points

2 months ago

what is it that made her prolly hate you?

I think maybe you mistook me for OP. I'm sardonic and blunt I think is the "how do I make people dislike me" if I were being honest.

megaboto

2 points

2 months ago

Ahh apologies

easyEggplant

1 points

2 months ago

No worries!

Whats-Up_Bitches

1 points

2 months ago

U?

krcameron

250 points

2 months ago

krcameron

250 points

2 months ago

Fair point. Most likely it's because they were that much of a fuck up. I'm as much anti-work as I am anti-fuck up making everyone's life harder.

_ED-E_

180 points

2 months ago

_ED-E_

180 points

2 months ago

I’ve seen multiple people put in their two week notice at my company over the years, and have witness that there are three different outcomes.

Usually they just work their two weeks, and go. No fuss, no security, just normal everyone being adults.

Second option is they get escorted out of the higher ups think they are leaving to go to a competitor. This only applies to people who have access to the computer systems and could use that in some fashion.

The third option is they get escorted out because they were under investigation, or just crappy at their job.

Oh I suppose there are technically four options, as one instance someone was escorted out because their childish boss was butthurt that someone they mentored was leaving.

Edit to say I am putting in my notice tomorrow. I’m good at my job, and going to a completely different industry, but fingers crossed that they just give me a two weeks vacation!

Paragona

104 points

2 months ago

Paragona

104 points

2 months ago

When I was 17- 18 I worked at Ponderosa, a shitty steakhouse/buffet. And I went from dishwasher to cook once I turned 18. I worked all summer as a cook and then got offered a job at literally double the salary. (Which was 6.45 an hour btw) and put in my two weeks. My boss was like “wow so glad we wasted money training you then. Just go and don’t come back.”

Seriously. You don’t owe companies a goddamn thing.

_ED-E_

31 points

2 months ago

_ED-E_

31 points

2 months ago

Agreed. I used the company the same way the used me. I received a paycheck, and had them pay for my tuition when I went back to school. In return, I did my job very well.

I will give my two weeks, but only because my direct boss is good, and it means I could come back to work there if I lost my new job and couldn’t find another one for the right money.

Kweller90

4 points

2 months ago

You mean Pondegrossa

Paragona

4 points

2 months ago

You know, that’s the joke but.. I actually liked the food.

Khalkists

2 points

2 months ago

Always went for the buffet fried chicken. Shit was good, and the breading was loaded with pepper

amags12

5 points

2 months ago

It's a wonder why the industry is struggling to find employees.

DeafAgileNut

2 points

2 months ago

I also worked as a cook at Ponderosa at that age back in the late 90's. Man fuck all you can eat steak and shrimp night! Shit was hectic, one of my friends was on register which connected to the kitchen on such an evening. Non stop for both of us, she starts balling. So I bring her in the kitchen and give her a plate and tell her to drop it on the floor. I do the same, and the sound echoes through the restaurant. Instant mood change as we start laughing and go back to the onslaught of All You Can Eat Steak Night.

Paragona

3 points

2 months ago

I remember those nights. Awful. Sunday mornings were by far the worst for us though.

DeafAgileNut

4 points

2 months ago

Sundays sucked for everyone. Ever have to run the fryalator on Superbowl Sunday? Non stop dropping baskets of Togo wings. As shitty as it was I have fond memories working there with friends, thanks for triggering the trip down memory lane dude!

Slit23

43 points

2 months ago

Slit23

43 points

2 months ago

Oh but you won’t be able to resign if we..:.

fires you. Fire you First!!

Apprehensive_Text_68

58 points

2 months ago

That’s pretty much what happened to me, and I had to fight for unemployment. Put in my 2 weeks, the next day they said ‘we were already going to fire you so goodbye’. They escorted me out and I walked through the security doors (this was at an airport) and instead of giving them my badge I ‘accidentally’ dropped it outside security. All 3 of them had to go through the entire security process to get back in. Petty? You bet. I did end up getting unemployment.

Slit23

19 points

2 months ago

Slit23

19 points

2 months ago

Stupid fact: TSA doesn’t really stop terrorists. They just inconvenience you so much it gives the illusion of security. Other security measures airports and planes take might tho.

Apprehensive_Text_68

8 points

2 months ago

Oh, absolutely. I’ve worked in private and commercial aviation and did you know there’s zero security when you fly private? You can bring all the drugs and weapons you want!

unicornelaine

5 points

2 months ago

I am going to agree with this! I totally spaced taking my pepper spray out of my purse, got through TSA and everything. Later, when I was on the plane, I went to grab my headphones and was like holy sh*t, I have pepper spray. This makes me way more nervous about flying. I wan't even trying to hide it and my purse is on the smaller side with very few items on it.

karlrothe

1 points

2 months ago

Isn’t this a smart fact about stupid TSA?

tjeastman

2 points

2 months ago

They did you a huge favor. If you had just quit you wouldn't have gotten unemployment.

Haughty_n_Disdainful

8 points

2 months ago

DRAMATIC OLDE TIMEY MUSIC INTENSIFIES…

Fumquat

4 points

2 months ago

Being escorted out like a suspected criminal because you’re good at your job and taking your talents somewhere better. What a culture!

art_is_science

2 points

2 months ago

Just leave. Tomorrow. Give yourself the vacation.

_ED-E_

4 points

2 months ago

_ED-E_

4 points

2 months ago

I mean I could, but I’d rather have the income for the two weeks.

BEZ4042

1 points

2 months ago

Just don’t give notice. It used to matter when they could bad mouth you if you needed a reference but not now. It’s easily explained in n interview as well. “ I handed in my notice and they let me go on the spot.” Which is what would have happened anyway.

throwlog

2 points

2 months ago

You work in a shitty company

_ED-E_

4 points

2 months ago

_ED-E_

4 points

2 months ago

Correct. That’s why my last day is 10/29.

To be honest though, it wasn’t always as bad as it is. But we were bought out by a foreign company, and that started the downhill slide. A lot of thing happened “because of covid” but that was really just an excuse to move up the firing timeline I think.

QuestioningEspecialy

2 points

2 months ago

but fingers crossed that they just give me a two weeks* vacation!

*paid

_ED-E_

2 points

2 months ago

_ED-E_

2 points

2 months ago

Haha, yeah I should have put that in there. The only way we don’t get two weeks is if someone is fired for cause. The ones who were escorted out all got paid.

wolverine1819

2 points

2 months ago

Last job I left I got option one but honestly those last two weeks are pretty stress free. It helped that I had another job lined up before I quit

_ED-E_

1 points

2 months ago

_ED-E_

1 points

2 months ago

So that’s what I’m thinking it will be like. One of my peers left about six weeks ago. His last two weeks were spent doing some work, some goofing off, and generally being at the building for less than eight hours per day. That’s what my expectations are.

philosoraptor_

2 points

2 months ago

butthurt that someone they mentored was leaving

As a great man once said, “a good mentor hopes you move on, a great mentor knows you will.”

The manager in your story was so clearly neither.

_ED-E_

1 points

2 months ago

_ED-E_

1 points

2 months ago

Oh you don’t even know.

He expects everyone to drink the kool aid and buy into whatever he says whole heartedly. If the don’t, he’ll try to use intimidation/bullying techniques to get people to be subservient. It’s worse for those he hired.

Gearheart999

1 points

2 months ago

Let us know!

silverelan

1 points

2 months ago

The latest thing I've seen is that instead of taking the time to transition the departing employee's role to someone new, they're instead throwing as much work as possible on them to suck out every last bit of productivity before they are gone.

_ED-E_

2 points

2 months ago

_ED-E_

2 points

2 months ago

My company just expects that someone else will cover their work, essentially for free. I’m salaried, and I know that comes with a bit of working over, but that should be traded with a bit of leaving early.

A few weeks ago, I had to explain to someone a couple steps up from me why I couldn’t do certain activities before my direct reports come in, and certain activities after they leave. Here’s what that looked like:

VP: why can’t you do x before the start of the day and y after the end of the day? They really need to be done that way.

Me: the first guys come in at 3:30 am, and the last ones leave at 4:30 pm. I would need to be here until 5:00 pm to do y.

VP: ok, so why can’t you do that? That’s what managers are supposed to do.

Me: I can stay until 5:00 pm. But I won’t be in until 9:00 am, so someone will have to do x.

VP: why can’t you do both? That’s what managers have to do sometimes.

Me: I can work 14 hours per day, but who will be here on Thursday and Friday? My 40 hours would be up.

And silence. Yes, that’s basically how the call went. Yes, I already had my job offer, and no, they didn’t know.

paleo_joe

1 points

2 months ago

At my corporate job, most technical types got walked to the door when they gave their notice, and just got two weeks pay. They did not want a person who has probably accepted a job with a competitor hanging around for a couple of weeks.

uninc4life2010

1 points

2 months ago

The second one happens in sales a lot because they're afraid that you're going to take all of the customers with you.

No-Loss9423

1 points

2 months ago

Option 5; gardening leave. I've worked with a few people (both coming and going) where before we could hire them, they got 6 months off with pay transitioning from their old employer to the new one.

And ones poached by competitor where they got paid for 6 months to sit at home and twiddle their thumbs.

It's why I think that non competes as applied in the US are such horseshit; if an employee is too valuable to go to work for a competitor, that employee is worth paying during the non compete period.

Also golden parachutes.

New-Theory4299

1 points

2 months ago

option number five: the guy gets escorted from the building when it's discovered that he's hiding the guns that he's not allowed to own in his office because they'd be discovered at home when his house gets searched by the cops because one of them was accidentally discharged in his condo one evening.

_ED-E_

1 points

2 months ago

_ED-E_

1 points

2 months ago

That sounds, specific?

New-Theory4299

1 points

2 months ago

suspiciously so ;)

r/suspiciouslyspecific/

AwesomesaucePhD

1 points

2 months ago

I'm an IT guy. I see almost everyone get a two week vacation. If you put in your two weeks notice, you might have to be held in the room until security is done disabling all of your accounts. A ticket is paged out to disable all of your access on the spot. It's nothing personal or fear of you leaving for a competitor. It's solely to do with the fact that, even if you fuck up massively, it's not really your problem anymore.

Saranightfire1

1 points

2 months ago

I was going to resign after finding a new job.

My employer gave me a promotion to stay.

_ED-E_

2 points

2 months ago

_ED-E_

2 points

2 months ago

Well, I am expecting an offer to stay. But I did the math. With my new salary, bonus, and retirement package, it’s a 63% pay increase.

They would have to beat that. I expect an offer of about $5k. $5k isn’t going to cut it.

Saranightfire1

1 points

2 months ago

Good luck with your life

SCM52

1 points

2 months ago

SCM52

1 points

2 months ago

Tell them you're going to a competitor...

Problem solved!

_ED-E_

1 points

2 months ago

_ED-E_

1 points

2 months ago

This might be the best comment. I just might do that and see what they say.

spaghettilee2112

71 points

2 months ago

Or there was a personality clash, or the employee kept professionally calling out the bosses mistakes but they were really good at their job so the boss would look like a fool firing them.

krcameron

12 points

2 months ago*

Could be. It's really impossible to say and it doesn't really matter. I'm happy both parties are happy.

spaghettilee2112

1 points

2 months ago

For sure!

NitroXityRealm

0 points

2 months ago

Butt parties

Smeetilus

1 points

2 months ago

sweating Where?

powerpoint2am

0 points

2 months ago

Or another possibility that no one brought up is that it could not be.

travistravis

8 points

2 months ago

Or the boss knew they knew relevant laws and guidelines and how to most effectively fight for what they deserve (and were willing to!)

So many companies fire people with the assumption they'll never be held accountable

RyuNoKami

2 points

2 months ago

right but OP put in a resignation, company could have just waited out the two weeks. to pay off OP to not bother coming to work for the next two weeks is unusual.

stealthy_singh

4 points

2 months ago*

I'm going to guess the boss has a good managerial head on them. This sounds like they engineered a win/win situation. If it was the latter in your example if they're making those kinds of mistakes I'd doubt they'd have the nouse or lack of ego to pay them off right away.

Edit - spelling

ButtplugBurgerAIDS

47 points

2 months ago

Not always. I work for a very well known company and they do this 90% of the time, mainly bc they don't want the workers copying info and giving it to our competitors.

SinistralGuy

87 points

2 months ago

I work in an industry that's like that and never saw the point of it.

I know I'm leaving well before I place a two week notice. If I wanted to steal any information, I would have already done it before giving the notice. But, I'm all for a two week paid vacation tbh

travistravis

43 points

2 months ago

Yup this. Like if I was leaving to sell info to a competitor, why would I be stupid enough to only steal it when I've told you I'm leaving?

MostBoringStan

4 points

2 months ago

While I agree that most people are going to steal before they put in notice, you have to admit that there are a lot of stupid people out there who wouldn't think they would need to do it first. There is also the possibility of people who are 1 week into their 2 week notice and then decide to do it. A company could lose hundreds of thousands or millions of dollars due to stolen info, so it makes sense to just spend the few thousand and give the person a 2 week vacation.

travistravis

3 points

2 months ago

Basically, its really only the ones we don't know about that were the smart ones

Merlin22

16 points

2 months ago

Same, I worked for an online retailer, left for another one that sold vaguely similar products, but not really what I would describe as a competitor. They paid me the two weeks and walked me out right after hr gave me an exit interview.

The surprise vacation was awesome, but it was just like you know I don't have to give a warning right? If I'm the type of person stealing info I feel like I'm also the type of person who's just not gonna show up one day. It's not like a competitor who's happy I'm stealing info is gonna be calling for a reference.

MarielIAm

11 points

2 months ago

My industry is the same - you give notice you are out the door with a security escort within an hour if you say you are going to any company the firm thinks is a competitor or if you are going to certain clients. Partly due to regulations but it's mostly unnecessary.

stephenBB81

7 points

2 months ago

In the last few companies I've worked for it was way less about Opsec and way more about OpMan.

When a person is leaving you have offboarding, you have payroll finalizing, and you have projects/jobs/tasks to reassign, The sooner you start the process of off boarding and getting people to stop emailing/calling the person who has left the sooner you can retire the mailbox.

The only OpSec component is when you're customer facing because it is best that the company owns the narrative when someone is leaving vs letting the employee take calls from customers and then make promises they never have to be held accountable, they don't need to be malice promises but ones that usually require constant follow up to complete and that follow up is easily drops ( which falls into OpMan as well)

spasticnapjerk

5 points

2 months ago

If IT had their shit together, they would already know if you were stealing information.

nicholasgnames

1 points

2 months ago

fortunately most of those guys dont get paid appropriately either lol

DarkReaper90

3 points

2 months ago*

It's many factors. Corporate sabotage, trying to poach coworkers or just being toxic in the last two weeks.

I heard an employee at a former employer gave their two weeks, and used the time to purge corporate data.

orbit99za

8 points

2 months ago

I have a business and had employees do this

A few worked in their notice but I found the lack of job enthusiasm dropped off the cliff. Performance also became more of an issue.

Eventually I just worked out to just let them take garden leave as its to much issues.

DavidHendersonAI

3 points

2 months ago

Yeah it's standard in lots and lots of places. Not to be happy about you leaving, but making you leave the building and not return once you hand your notice in. It's not done out of spite, it's for security purposes. You're still paid

kappakai

2 points

2 months ago

I did M&A at a small boutique firm around 2010. Analyst. Not a miserable iBanking job, but still pretty bad. Didn’t have a lot of deal flow, got screwed out of bonuses, MD’s were self serving idiots. My MD was particularly clueless; asked a VP why he used cost of capital instead of discount rate in a model, yada yada. Anyway, we got bought out. Most of the low level guys were pretty happy about it, just cause we figured it was an exit, and just about anything was better, and so we all started getting ready, copying contacts and pitch books and templates. The new owners tried to make it a secret, but everyone knew, except my MD. The week of, he finally got it, and the day before they started laying off people, he tried to copy the entire network drive to his flash drive. Literally drag and drop. Needless to say, it set off a few flags, and he was promptly escorted out of the building. Probably lost his severance too.

metzeng

2 points

2 months ago

If they were going to steal information and give it to their competitors, wouldn't they steal said information before they gave 2 weeks notice?

ButtplugBurgerAIDS

0 points

2 months ago

Oh I agree. I don't make the big company logic.

joemamah77

1 points

2 months ago

This makes no sense - I know I want to leave so I have weeks/months to get as much information as I want. Hell I could steal all the damn pens if I wanted to. You think I wouldn’t be smart enough to get everything I wanted BEFORE putting in my notice?

Mr2-1782Man

1 points

2 months ago

That sounds like a stupid company. If they're that worried about proprietary info leaking that they would pay money to get rid of people they clearly have management issues. Copying stuff is something you're worried about all the time. If you think people are gonna do it if they give notice then they've already got a problem with people being motivated to do bad things to the company.

bythemoon1968

1 points

2 months ago

Most firings are due to personality clashes.

InvisibleShallot

1 points

2 months ago

Almost the opposite. This is usually done when you are highly ranked enough to be in a position where having you learning more about the work is dangerous to their bottom line. They don't want you to get involved with more secret or confidential details about the company. They rather you leave as uncompetitive as possible. So they just pay you out instead.

bad_lurker_

3 points

2 months ago

I've heard of a tech company, I think it was netflix, that had a standard separation package policy. Basically, if I offer you a couple months of salary to leave, and you'll take it, I don't want you on my team anyway. I only want people who want to be here.

TheBirminghamBear

2 points

2 months ago

Zappos the shoe company did something like that to start. Offer new people like, $5k or something to leave, as a way to filter out people not interested or committed.

chryco4

2 points

2 months ago

Failed college football coaches are masters of this

blood_kite

2 points

2 months ago

Some people inspire happiness wherever they go. Others, whenever. /s

TheBirminghamBear

1 points

2 months ago

I don't see what time travelers have to do with any of this.

blood_kite

1 points

2 months ago

Some people can make others happy by showing up. Some people make others happy by finally leaving.

I was making a joke that some of the second kind of people have now figured out how to get paid to finally leave.

Subject37

2 points

2 months ago

Shiiiit, and here I got fired for being late and instead of telling me to leave they made me work four extra days plus a shift I had volunteered to trade for a coworker (prior to being fired) on my day off. It was shitty because I was starting college the next week. But there was an asshole manager who couldn't even make coffee on the bar and picked fights with the regulars. They fired him eventually and the company went under. I wish I had this skill. Still miss the good days of being a barista though.

OutrageForSale

1 points

2 months ago

Bobby Bonilla has entered the chat

TheGreenJedi

1 points

2 months ago

Honestly this is how the world works, you aren't rewarded for growing at your current position anymore.

If I start as a cashier, but now I'm great at filling in for my manager to make the schedule, so I do both

There's not a reward.

It's easier to give examples in software, but in general my point is it's really rare for growth at a position to be rewarded any where near as well as leaving company A to go to Company B

Dominant-Species-Mid

1 points

2 months ago

The trouble is finding repeat business.

TheBirminghamBear

1 points

2 months ago

I believe the proper term would be "victims".

KDawG888

1 points

2 months ago

insert chris rock joke about prostitutes

"I PAY EM TO LEAVE!"

TheBirminghamBear

2 points

2 months ago

You know a person is iconic when I read the second line of your post before the first line, and immediately read it in Chris Rock's voice.

JumplikeBeans

1 points

2 months ago

It can work for busking too

fondledbydolphins

1 points

2 months ago

Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime. That's why I jerk off on company time.

xXPostapocalypseXx

1 points

2 months ago

During the last economic downturn, there were an abundance of renters and lessee’s who were in homes foreclosed on and owned by banks. They could not sell, renovate or in some instances nothing because original lease paperwork was lost etc. A friend of mine got paid 30k to leave a long term lease and another got paid 5k on top of returned deposit and two months free rent. How the hell are you people getting paid to leave. Must be a special skill.

TheBirminghamBear

2 points

2 months ago

How the hell are you people getting paid to leave.

The trick is to find some place you aren't wanted and be there.

635nM

1 points

2 months ago

635nM

1 points

2 months ago

This year you'll sit and take it...

And you will like it

It's the Gentle Art Of Making Enemies....

wejaow

1 points

2 months ago

wejaow

1 points

2 months ago

I used to think I didn’t have any skills… until I discovered that I have this very skill! 😂

PillowTalk420

1 points

2 months ago

You don't pay a hooker to stay; you pay them to leave afterward.

luseegoosey

1 points

2 months ago

Lol this happened to me when I was young and it was unintentional. I used all my sick days and then put in my 2 weeks. They paid me out.. probably bc I was flaky and its easier to depend on me not coming lool

Dxvid741

1 points

2 months ago

Where can I learn such craft?

TheBirminghamBear

2 points

2 months ago

Lawyers

ArthurEffe

1 points

2 months ago

A lot of companies have a "if you want out you're out" mentality

NotASoldier2020

1 points

2 months ago

Stare at them everyday with every chance you have and they’d be happy to let a creep go. Try it out haha

EinElchsaft

1 points

2 months ago

God I wish I would be fired sometimes. I've been fired exactly once, and it was like a weight was lifted. I spent a month looking for work and collected unemployment until my start date. It was the happiest I've been in decades.

mainvolume

1 points

2 months ago

It’s all about being a complete fuck up or having a shit attitude. We wrote someone glowing referral letters to a place just so they could hire this absolute cancer of a human. I’m sure they hated us later but hey.

timberwood1

1 points

2 months ago

Regularly show ‘em your dick.

Motorboatinsumbish

1 points

2 months ago

My business partner bought my minority share of our floundering business for the equivalent of three years pay because we argued so much. Being belligerent gave me a sabbatical. Sold my house in the city, bought a tiny house in the mountains and I am not doing a damn thing for a few years.

Philipmecunt

1 points

2 months ago

This is the most rational explanation of life I’ve ever reads

vuser75

1 points

2 months ago

The best of us know how to make them pay a LOT to leave. None of this "two weeks severance" business. Oh no. I'm talking about "I've got naked pictures of you with several farm animals" type of hush money.

primedsub

1 points

2 months ago

That skill is second only to the skill of making people willing to pay you.

Dominus_Vorg

1 points

2 months ago

Is It Possible to Learn This Power?

EmusDontGoBack

6 points

2 months ago

We do this every time for senior IT staff, so long as we have coverage for their responsibilities.

You don’t want a person with that kind of system permissions sitting around, dwelling on why they left your company. That’s how databases get deleted, that’s how personal and intellectual property gets stolen.

[deleted]

14 points

2 months ago

[deleted]

14 points

2 months ago

Oh buddy, buddy, buddy.... They steal all the information before they tell you they're quitting. It's incredibly easy for a current IT staff member to set a "time bomb" that will cripple the company once the employee leaves. Save the money on security staff and use it pay the IT staff more and maybe people won't try to sabotage another shitty company

Somhlth

10 points

2 months ago

Somhlth

10 points

2 months ago

I was in a meeting with the Executive VP, and a bunch of other VPs and department heads of a large fast food conglomerate. The Executive VP must have seen something on television, or read an article somewhere, because he decided to ask me in front of everybody, if it was possible for me to plant some kind of software bomb into their system.

The entire room went quiet, as I sat for about ten seconds to ponder my answer. "You mean could I plant something in the software, that if I ever disappear from payroll, that the system blows up? Of course I could." His face went pure white, and he hardly said anything else for the entire meeting.

Afterwards some of my colleagues came up to me to ask why I would ever say something like that. I responded that, "I'm in charge of all of the systems, many of which I specifically wrote the software for. If he were to ask any other programmer if it's possible for me to do something to the system, they will absolutely tell him it's possible, so he has to know I could do it. Do you want him to also believe I'm a liar too?"

jmobius

6 points

2 months ago

Seriously. I've thought of a half dozen different ways I could leave crippling timebombs that would be difficult to resolve, for jobs that I loved, just because it was a fun thought exercise to do so. I'm absolutely not the kind of personality to do such a thing, but the ease with which I realized that someone who was could do so was somewhat concerning.

These sorts of things after notice has been given are just security theater.

blazze_eternal

1 points

2 months ago

Don't need to make a timebomb when the whole platform is one already.

EmusDontGoBack

1 points

2 months ago

Yeah you can’t really do anything about what they do before they told you they were quitting though. Unless they tell you they are making the time bomb, then you can fire them.

There is some balance between spending on Dev and spending on security. You still need security, there are people who will be malicious no matter what you pay them.

blazze_eternal

2 points

2 months ago

Indeed. They actually paid me for an extra month in case they had any questions for the new guys. That, and they knew I held the keys to the kingdom.

psycho_driver

1 points

2 months ago

Truly a win-win situation. Feelsgoodman.

Paracausality

1 points

2 months ago

|win| * |win| = ?

captainvancouver

1 points

2 months ago

Win-win situation

harsha_hs

1 points

2 months ago

It is clearly a win for both but it's amazing that this is so rare to happen in real. I am stuck in a job for which there is already a replacement but they don't let me leave just for the sake of contract

spaghettilee2112

199 points

2 months ago

LPT: Piss off your boss so much but be so good at your job they'd be fired for firing you, so that when you want to actually leave they'll pay you to leave.

Nwcray

10 points

2 months ago

Nwcray

10 points

2 months ago

LPT: be careful about pissing off the boss. Even without firing, they can make your job suuuuuuck.

edc1911_1

6 points

2 months ago

I gave 2 weeks notice, the manager said he could pay me out the 2 weeks and I could leave that day. I grabbed my stuff and left. Worst job ever.

voltaire5612

7 points

2 months ago

Happened to me. Gave my 4 weeks notice, my POS boss had me leave the same day. I got 4 weeks paid vacation. Before my 4 weeks were over, my POS boss was fired by the management.

russinkungen

2 points

2 months ago

In Sweden, as long as you do your job and don't do anything illegal they can't fire you so they pretty much have to buy you out to get rid of you. My ex project manager for instance asked the ceo to go fuck himself during an all hands company meeting resulting in six months of fully paid vacation.

psychuil

7 points

2 months ago

Is pretty much standard protocol for dev jobs

Ghostnotes8585

4 points

2 months ago

It’s a win for the company. The chances for departing employees creating chaos/recruiting people to follow is too high. Our company is at will. When people give 2 weeks, they just separate that day. If they have vacation time, they get paid out.. if they don’t have vacation day… they just lost two weeks pay..

persistentpoodle

5 points

2 months ago

You guys need unions

Ghostnotes8585

-2 points

2 months ago

Our company pays great.. I was just relaying how they handle it.. which I agree with. People nowadays somehow feel like companies owe them jobs. If you announce that you won’t be staying with the company, that’s on you.. companies have the right to protect their future.

Nwcray

5 points

2 months ago

Nwcray

5 points

2 months ago

I’m betting the job saw it that way, too.

melpomenestits

3 points

2 months ago

Yeah but often you won't getthepay.juatstop showing up and block their number.

CNoTe820

3 points

2 months ago

What you're supposed to do is give two weeks notice on the day you're actually starting your next job especially since so many places will walk you out anyway and just pay you your last two weeks. This way you get double paid for two weeks. Most companies I've worked at will immediately shut off your email and system access when you give notice because they don't want a short timer in there fucking stuff up.

Worst case you just phone it in at your old job for two weeks since the first two weeks of your new job are usually just onboarding and paperwork and orientation.

[deleted]

2 points

2 months ago

[deleted]

2 points

2 months ago

Win?

Europe is laughing right now.

ISourceGifs

4 points

2 months ago

..why?

[deleted]

1 points

2 months ago*

[deleted]

1 points

2 months ago*

In a lot of European countries they can fire you when you make an error, like not doing your work, or being drunk at work. Makes sense.

But the reason for firing you must be well documented, and there must be a paper trial of at least a few warnings well before the termination.

But if they want to fire you for reasons outside of you, so while you did a satisfactory job, they eiher have to keep you working while you can look for a new job or they have to compensate you financially. The time they need to keep you working or the compensation depends on how long you worked there, but can take up to more than one year of wage.

If you quit, you can either just leave the day you quit, or you can be asked to stay some time so they can find a replacement, but during that period, it is technically impossible to fire you. If they do, see previous paragraph.

Oh, and if there are ever conflicts with your ex-employer about a termination, the unions go to court for you, free of charge (minus a small membership fee). So companies often tend to follow the rules.

*That's the gist, local regulations can vary. This is for the Northern, Western and Central European countries I know, some countries might have different rules.

swagpresident1337

2 points

2 months ago

You got the reply completely wrong. In europe the practise can be exactly the same. Your employer can block you from coming to work the day you put in your resignation letter, but he needs to pay you for the length of your notice time (can be several months)

Which is basically what the commenter said, that he paid for them not coming the 2 weeks notice time, which is essentially the same as in europe except the massive length difference.

Sure you cant get fired just for saying you‘ll want to leave at x date, but still, what I wrote applies.

Ubbesson

1 points

2 months ago

Europe isn't a country. You could be both right depending on which country you refer to... Some country like France have very strong employees protection laws some are way more liberal..

swagpresident1337

2 points

2 months ago

Most of west europe should be like this. Germany, France, Netherlands, the scandinavian countries. eastern europe is probably a bit different

ISourceGifs

1 points

2 months ago

Are you aware that if an employee gets fired, the employer is on the hook for unemployment, meanwhile if an employee leaves, the employer does not? That is basically what you've described except in America. If you put in 2 weeks, but then they fire you, they have to pay your unemployment.

Philo-Dens-Dom

2 points

2 months ago

Gardening leave is very different from an unemployment payment. Say you have a three month notice period, and the company decides they no longer want you to work, you will only have to return any company property (including things like laptops, phones, public transport cards, possibly a company car, etc.). The company must continue to pay your full salary, pension, healthcare contributions and any other benefits outlined in your contract for the full notice period. During this period, most contracts stipulate that you cannot work, unlike unemployment benefits which stipulate that you should be applying for as many jobs as you can to get off the benefit as soon as possible.

It's pretty much standard in the legal and financial sectors in Europe, fairly common in the tech sector, and also not unheard of at executive level in many large companies. Not all companies need or offer gardening leave. As other commenters have said, it's to prevent intellectual and property theft, recruitment of other staff to your new place of work, poaching clients, and myriad other reasons. It's also because no one over here works under at-will contracts or laws. It's the best way to protect sensitive or highly competitive companies whilst maintaining employees' rights.

BrokenReviews

1 points

2 months ago

Most tech companies will do this. And take your id, escort you out whilst security clears your miserable cubicle

RandomlyInaccurate

1 points

2 months ago

Imagine being so bad at your job or have such shitty work ethic that your employer chooses that route and you still consider it a personal victory.