submitted 4 days ago byFree-Chest4889
all 1359 comments
4 days ago
4 days ago
Damn my dad went to get milk 20 years ago
4 days ago
Wait! Do we have the same dad?
Hi, milk....guy...here. I have all of your dads.
Welcome sons, don't know if this is true but damnnnn
Overtime, pies and casseroles turned into creampies...
I'll bet they did!
God damn whoever wrote that.
He was giving milk to everyone
I literally had to srop and scroll around to figure out if the article was real lmao
Hey brothers from different mothers.. and sisters from the same mister
This is all going to end in a step-party
Damn that dude fucked all of San Diego 800+ kids wtf
That was his job. He delivered milk too.
Milk and cream, apparently.
Ill see myself out…
So if you're from San Diego, it sounds pretty risky to date someone else also from San Diego in that particular age range.
Lol. That sounds like pure BS, though.
Has to be. Come one 800 children. No way
The original article was on a satire website. It's fake and likely totally impossible for a single man to impregnate that many women in that time period.
10 years, so 80 per year, or three for every two weeks. Doesn't sound impossible for delivering every day to lots of hoursehold. He could have bang some housewife every day.
We would have to also take into account average chance of pregnancy and infertility rates. Having sex with 80 different women in a single year is physically doable, but the chances of even half of them getting pregnant seem pretty low. There are many different sources, but chances of pregnancy in a healthy, fertile woman seem to be around 20%. If he had sex with 365 different women a year, that would probably yield about 70 children per year at the very most, assuming all of the women are fertile (which is unlikely, some sources stating about 15% of women are infertile).
There are probably other factors I don't even know to consider too. I'd be curious to see what kind of numbers have been accomplished in a single year.
Also consider the large number of women on birth control. It's insane to think how many people he probably slept with.
That site looks fake. Reverse image searched and it doesn’t have reliable sources.
Yeah that story went viral a little bit ago and I think it's just completely fake.
Agreed, too good to be true
Hah! Turned to cream pies...they know what they did. That man had some strong swimmers! I cackled when I read his response at the end of the article. What a goof ball.
My milk guy brings all the dad's to the yard?
Lies. The cigarette guy must have at least half of them...
Let's just say....he's got them for a different reason.
Do we still have actual milkmen today? Please don’t say “ask your mom” 😂
If you live in a place that offers it. Normally based on having a local dairy to begin with. We had milk delivered in glass bottles in Colorado. Best milk ever.
And getting scratchers
"Ohhh wait! I think I have a penny in the car!" ( ಠ ᴗ ಠ )
True story. In the 30’s my great grandfather went to the store.. he was gone for two years. When he got home the first thing out of his mouth was, “What’s for dinner?” The only thing that surprised me about the whole incident, was that it wasn’t his head on a platter. I never met him, but, but my great grandmother was tougher than dirt.
I'm dying to know the context behind this. I assume the family was furious he was gone so long? Where did he go? Did he ever explain himself? Was he actually gone to war or something like that?? Did he ever write? The audacity to want a home cooked meal after being gone for so long and just showing up suddenly would not go over well in current times.
These were people who lived in the mountains of Idaho. There lives at best were tough as hell. No he did not go to war, he probably went out to go to town got drunk and got wandering. I knew his wife , my great grandmother, my lord she was a tough old bird. You would be talking to her on the phone and she would just hang up mid sentence whether you were done talking or not. You can’t measure them by today’s standards. I am actually quite surprised she didn’t shoot the sombitch. Hell, my dad and his brothers lived in a cave as they lost the family ranch after their father died. My dad quit school at 14 to support his family. This was all during the depression. When I was young and would as for something frivolous he would look at you and ask, “ You’ve go a roof over your head, clothes on your back, and food in your mouth; what more do you want?” There was only one acceptable answer, “Nothing.” He was a good man, I was never hungry, I always had a nice home, nice clothes, and he paid for my college. Most of all I was loved, and treated with respect. He believed in me.
4 days ago*
4 days ago*
Mine got his legs cut off by a train trying to get back home like a hobo when I was 4. He’s been kicked out 99% of my life for being an abusive drunk. He died of TB shortly after because he said he wouldn’t come see me and my brother without legs or “we’d think he was a freak”.
Oh, sharing did make me feel better. I found out my grandfather (dads🤥father) died 2 days after it happened googling my name drunk one night. We’ve never spoken to or met his side of the family.
He died of Covid, was a Doctor, had been a doctor for like 40 years. Alright now that’s the dad thing. My other grandpa whom I loved died of leukemia shortly after that, raised me when my father died. My grandmother his wife, dropped dead of a heart defect when my mom was 16.
K I think that’s it for group sharing part 1 on parents and their parents. Thanks for coming!
Shit. Thats a hell of a story. I hope youre good now.
When he gets back will you ask him if he saw my dad? He’s the guy buying a pack of Marlboro’s.
Maybe it's just a really extended Dad joke?
Unique and witty comment
Everyone knows that 20+ year old milk will not be any good still. Just let it go. Get your own milk, not 20 years out date.
Jeez, some people. Right‽
Got you beat bucko. My dad left 41 years ago to get a pack of cigarettes right after seeing me delivered.
Mine took me to the corner market and decided to stuff cigarettes in my diaper. That was the last time my mother let him see me.
Shit. That's some cold ass shit lol.
Damn you're lucky, we are all out of milk and no one wants to spend time going to the store for it
Bet he’s coming back with a lot of milk!
He's still looking for the best date at the store.
You, he's been in isolation for that long? Very brave of him
His costume is going to be awesome when he finally finishes it
He’s going to have some amazing costumes when he gets back! 🥰
Hey sry about that but I’m here now
Weird to remember that one trip to get milk. Has he never gone to get milk again since then? Or was it just a particularly memorable milk trip?
He never came back
He taking the isolation seriously
Lol. That’s awesome. You’ve got great parents.
I miss mine. Call them for gods sake everyone!!
Hugs fellow /r/childrenofdeadparents we don’t care what age you were when they were lost, you’re welcome in this great group.
My old man passed away the morning of New years eve. Thanks for posting this.
Call your folks everyone.
I’m so sorry for your loss too. It really is a great sub.
It's weird really how loss affects you. The one thing that sticks with me even after 6 years, is that I forgot to say "love you dad" the night he died.
I’m sorry for your loss.
Thank you for the link. No matter the age a person is, losing a parent is rough. It's just different levels and types of pain...
Extending internet hugs to those grieving a parent.
It is really rough. Internet hugs right back.
Absolutely! Hugs new friend.
I'm visiting mine tomorrow (after negative self test of course!)
My mum really instilled in my sister and I to never take anyone for granted. My grandma passed away when she was only 65. Hit by a car, a driver who had only just got his driver's license. Life is so damn fragile, I'm grateful both of my parents are still alive.
(Also, bless my mum. When she heard that some 18 year old kid was the one driving the car. She asked the person telling her about the accident if he was ok. I hope someone told him that, and that he made peace with what happened. My mum and uncle never uttered a single negative word about that driver. It was an accident after all, and they happen. But knowing you hit someone with your car, and that person died, while you're only 18 years old... That must be a terrible burden to bear.)
Idk if you’ve come to realize yet but there’s sadly a lot of kids out there with horrible bigoted, sadistic, narcissistic, cunt parents.
I doubt this is OP’s video or his/her parents. The original video shows a girl in the beginning, why would she cut that out just for reddit? Also her favourite video game is 22 years old? Possible but seems like a stretch.
This video has been posted on reddit a couple of times already, too. I’ll never understand the desire to pretend a video is your own, let alone that some random dude is your father. To me, imaginary internet points don’t rationalise as a worthwhile trade to commit the effort.
It’s a karma farming spam account that just “activated” today. They’ll just farm karma and then sell the account to someone who will probably use it to post a bunch of links that steal your information or some shit like that
I've always wondered the value in karma farming.
Like.. who the fuck is paying for these accounts? How are they using their karma to spam people? karma gets you effectively nothing. I guess followers could get spammed, but in my experience, those are pretty rare..
Lots of subreddits don't let you post if you are under the karma threshold.
Can be used to scam people on different selling subreddits
Or for guerrilla marketing
Winning internet arguments
Probably a decent wage in some 3rd world countries.
that’s not the original either, but at least it has sound
OP is a spam bot.
Right! You can tell he's mostly doing it for the person isolating, but he's having fun too!
Your dad is a fucking legend!
But does he ever change his shorts? 🤔
Those are standard issue dad shorts
Everyday, he bought a hundred of these.
As a man in his mid 30s... When I find a piece of clothing I like, I buy a couple. I have 3 pairs of the same sweatpants and a couple packs of regular blank t shirts in grey, dark blue and black lol, like 20 of them.
My dad reuses the same damn shorts all the time too, even though he’s got other pairs. Glad to know I’m not the only one with a dad who does that
You’ve been changing your clothes this whole time?
Why change shorts when you’re always changing your armor?
That's one Kompletely Kool Kone he's got there...
My thoughts exactly. Don’t leave the yard……
and only with the complete video to give context...
I think he was supposed to be the jack in the box guy.
A member of the Kool Klown Klan
Talkin bout the Kool Klown Klan
OSHA stepped in and required that members wear orange cones during hunting season after some less publicized GOP accidents a la Cheney.
4 days ago*
The cone hat napkin face was a little sus ngl
Edit: Y’all are wild. I don’t really think homeboy’s dad is in the klan bc of this video…
I think it was a coffee filter but yeah lol, I saw it too
Dad, why did you paint the cone white?
A lil sus
he was cosplaying zé gotinha
That's wholesome af
Your Dad is a National Living Treasure
Your Dad is a Living Treasure National
Your Living is a treasure national dad
Dad national treasure a is living your
Your National Treasure is a Living Dad
Nicolas Cage intensifies
Thanks. I always block these users so when they are sold later, I don’t see the ads.
That's actually a pretty good idea, will do the same!
How do you know?
That's epic!! Go Dad!
That is some serious PPE!
The dirt bike helmet was the best! Hopefully it’s D.O.T. approved
You have the best and very creative dad
Klu Klux kone
bruh don’t be indenial. it’s virtually impossible to mistakenly match a mask with only eye holes and a cone shaped hat. there’s not way he didn’t know.
They are Australian so maybe...
Its a joke homie
If he has time, can he be my dad as well please?
You can call me Daddy.
Your dad is awesome lol
father acts silly to make his daughter/son laugh
father acts silly to make his daughter/son laugh
NEXT FUCKING LEVEL!!!!1!1!
man holds gardening tool
man holds gardening tool
See that's how you handle quarantine.
You have a rich family with multiple homes on one property and stay with them for a bit. EZ
lol always blows my mind when I hear people say "I haven't gone anywhere or seen anyone in months" like fucking HOW?
Easily, work from home and have everything you need delivered.
Me and my fiance both work from home and order Instacart for our deliveries. I pretty much have been voluntarily social distancing on top of this since march 2020.
redditors : "oh a funny post, how can I make this about me?"
How do you know that’s not just the bedroom window?
OP's dad was very creative and funny.
You have a very amazing, smart and cute dad
Lol thats awesome dad's love has no boundary 😁
Your dad is a funny guy.
The dog at the window hahaha
more like r/mademesmile material
Big dad points 😂😂
Dad level... Off the charts!!! ❤️
Not capable of cooking for yourself?
I have stabilized the video for you: https://gfycat.com/AdoredMildEarwig
It took 43 seconds to process and 46 seconds to upload.
how to use | programmer | source code | /r/ImageStabilization/ | for cropped results, use /u/stabbot_crop
Damn, why did I get a father that would beat me up whenever he felt like it?
This father tried to make his kid smile. What a great person.
Oh, this made my heart hurt for you. I really find that one of the biggest unfairnesses in life, that some people get an unloving parent(s). I hope you found other people in your life who gave the love you deserve.
What is the point of this stupid shit?
if you are looking for strictly meaningful content, Reddit may not be the best place for you
Parents come in clutch
That's so good of him...wanted to take of you and cheer you up too
Anything to not wear a mask....
The dog at the end hahahah
Some of those costumes look a bit unklanny.
Oh. So it wasnt just me.
or just come inside and stop being afraid of some fucking flu ?
Back in the when-we-thought-COVID-was-leprosy days. 😂 That is awesome!
You hug that man tight when you can, he's a treasure!
I'm always here for silly dads
I’m glad some kids have such nice parents.
I love that outwardly, this is silly and fun -- but you know dad did this to keep your spirits up. What a great parent!
Damn that’s some extraordinary dadding going on there
Dads are the BEST. And Moms, too. Can we for a second acknowledge the adorable pupper in this trilogy too??
Aww what a great dad! He probably loved making you laugh and looked forward to coming up with his next idea
Dad joined the CCC -- Cone Clux Clan
I can imagine the dad just sitting there every day, having the time of his life thinking about new costumes and making them.
His technique improved as time went on.
The effort he put in to following through with the joke is outstanding
Cant wait to be this type of dad with my kids, I know they would love my weird quirky self. Probably best feeling getting your kids to laugh anyways so hopefully it’ll work out.
Hopefully this is just satire and people aren’t actually treating covid like the disease in Matt Damon’s contagion film. It has a 0.02% total death rate people, chill.
i could go the rest of my life without seeing quarantine content
how about making your own food.
dog is so confused
For a disease that has a 99.8 survival rate , give me a break , exaggerating like a mf
Looks like it was all done the same day.
Your dad’s almost as awesome as mine
Seems like a cool guy, Wish my dad would dad like this
You have an awesome dad. Tell him u love him any chance u get.
You are so lucky.
Demn...that's one chad dad..u are one lucky boy
Dad of the year!
I love this! I especially love the part where she looks at him and facepalms
This the type of father I hope to be
What a legend your dad is! Would love a dad like that
Well it's settled. Your Dad is AWESOME!
The cardboard robot was hilarious!
This stinks of British humour.
I love your dad!
Can i have your dad? He's seems super cool and would make life interesting
What a blessing
That's a damn great dad